Our Pet Parent Life: Chewie & Lucy's Mom - Part 2

Last month, Chewie & Lucy’s Mom began sharing her “Pet Parent Life” Story. In Part 1, she bragged on her two fur babies, telling us about their favorite things, nicknames, and more… (You can read Part 1 here.) This month, Chewie and Lucy’s Mom continues her “Pet Parent Life” Story. In Part 2, she begins by telling us about how her fur babies are helping her redefine. Then, she explains what she wants others to know about the childless pet parent life. So, let me turn it over to Chewie & Lucy’s Mom…

Pet Parent Life: Chewie & Lucy’s Mom…

How has your pet baby helped you redefine, create a new plan, find joy despite…

Mid-2015…

By mid-2015, my hubby and I were coming to terms with our journey of having a child not eventuating. We had just moved into our first home. A key criterion while house hunting was having a secure backyard that was suitable for a Labrador puppy. We looked through so many websites from registered Labrador breeders. Finally, we found one whose motto was to have puppies bred to be healing spirits who will change lives. Chewie and Lucy have exceeded these expectations in every way!

November 2015…

When Chewie’s litter was born, we were in the midst of making the decision to end our infertility rollercoaster. We tell people that Chewie chose us to be his pawrents when we went to see his litter at 6 weeks old. He was the puppy that stayed cuddling with us for ages when his siblings had gone back to their beds! By the time he came home to live furever with us in late November 2015, my broken heart was able to start healing with his loving nature and soulful, amber eyes. Chewie definitely changed our lives by bringing us so much joy, happiness, unconditional love and giving me the ability to feel like a mummy.

January 2017…

We had never planned to have more than one dog. But once we saw Chewie with other dogs, especially other Labs, we knew that our family would not be complete until we got him a sibling. So, we got him a sister. (They share the same dad and are also connected through their maternal side.) In January 2017, Lucy brought her sweet, cheeky, and loving personality into our home.

August 2018…

In August 2018–on the anniversary of an infertility grief milestone–we did a photoshoot. The photographer wanted to get portraits with people whose dogs were more like family members than pets. It was after this amazing experience that I realised that I had been living in a fog, believing that my life without a human child of my own was somehow less than desirable or without the possibility of real joy. But then I found myself thinking out loud – why have I assumed that being childless is “less” or that having a child would have been this amazing experience filled with rainbows and no pain at all?

That was the day that I realised I had been through other challenges and traumas in life long before experiencing childlessness…… Each time I faced challenges, I found a way to get back up and move forward. So, I realised that with Chewie and Lucy, they were part of me #RedefiningmyPlanA by choosing to thrive rather than just survive being a #childlessnotbychoice person.

What would you like others to know (or understand) about the childless not by choice pet parent life?

Healing & Resilience…

Having Chewie and Lucy in our family has given my hubby & I the ability to raise two amazing babies who know us as Mummy and Daddy, and that has been such a fantastic blessing. I call Chewie the “healer of my heart,” as he helped my heart slowly become whole again. Lucy taught me the true meaning of resilience by her ability to stay strong despite going through a traumatic experience.

Happy…

Our mornings start on a very happy note, seeing their faces at the bottom of the stairs. Our evenings are often spent as a family, watching TV together while they snuggle with us. And the night ends with me tucking them into their beds. All of these are daily rituals that brings us so much joy and peace.

Surprise & Joy…

They are incredibly bright and often surprise us with their ability to understand full conversations we have with them. (Well, they always seem to understand what we say, and they reply with their eyes or actions.) The best of coming home, whether from work or even something as mundane as grocery shopping, is their pure unadulterated joy from seeing us return.

On being a LabraMummy…

Here’s what being a LabraMummy has given me:

The opportunity to meet and connect with other childless fur parents all over the world!
The opportunity to have a fulfilling life where I get to spend time with Chewie and Lucy both at home, on holidays, out at cafes and even wineries!
I am also grateful for being able to leave my fur babies safely at home and go out without them.
Having been in a hard lockdown for most of 2020 and having their undemanding company while I worked from home was such a lifesaver for my mental and physical health.
Just because I don’t have a human child doesn’t mean that I don’t know the feeling of being a mother and the love a mother has for her children. I have had to nurse both my dogs when they were sick. In fact, my Lucy got badly injured in 2019 and I nursed her back to health, including feeding her by hand when she was too sick to eat. As a result, our bond has become so strong as she will always remember that I was there for her.
When I’m out with my fur babies, I find that people are so much more friendly, and I often see people break into a smile & say “hello” when they see Chewie and Lucy.
I’m so glad that Mother’s Day is no longer the painful experience it was before we got Chewie and Lucy. I get to be spoilt for both Mother’s Day and Dog Mother’s Day each year!
Going to the beach is so much fun as they have so much enjoyment by just being in the water and not requiring us to take anything else to amuse them.
Getting presents for them is so easy. They have no idea what events like birthdays, Christmas or Easter are. So, there are never any demands or tantrums about what they get. They’d be just as happy getting nothing or getting some treats.

In conclusion, I would love for others to know that being a childless not by choice pet parent is a very fulfilling life. I consider myself very blessed to have both Chewie and Lucy in my heart and in my life.

My Thoughts on Chewie & Lucy’s Mom’s Story…

As I read this story, I was overcome with emotion. Tears sprang to my eyes, as I nodded along in agreement. Joy, grief, feelings of solidarity… They all intermingled…

Chewie & Lucy’s Mom was one of the first fabulous ones to discover Not So Mommy… way back in August 2017, when I began blogging. Her unwavering support of Not So Mommy… Well, it’s hard to put into words what that means to me.

As we have gotten to know each other better over the years, we have connected deeply as fur mamas. We also both have an intense passion to educate others about the childless not by choice experience. Because of that, Chewie & Lucy’s Mom decided to create the hashtag #RedefiningmyPlanA. I adore this perspective. And I love that this phenomenal childless dog mom redefined the Not So Mommy… hashtag, #RedefiningMomhood, to fit her own journey.

Since coining her hashtag, she has created Facebook and Instagram pages, as well as a website. I encourage you to check out #RedefiningmyPlanA, as Chewie & Lucy’s Mom has a beautiful heart, an incredible perspective, and is truly one of the loveliest people I have ever met…

THANK YOU for sharing your story, Liz! Sending you so many HUGS!!!

*All photos, names, social media, & sites shared with permission.