What does it mean to be “Not So Mommy…?” Well, for me, it always starts like this…
Do you have kids?
It seems like such a simple question. An easy conversation starter.
But for me, it is loaded.
The simple answer—no.
I do not have kids in the traditional sense. I have never been pregnant and I have not adopted. But, I do have kids. But if I say “yes,” I feel like I’m lying. Because it’s complicated.
I’m a Mom. But not in the traditional way. I’m a dog mom (which I recently discovered is a controversial term, which is weird to me). I’m a host mom. I’m also a Tia to my nieces & nephews and a Profe to my former students. I’m a wife and a woman, a daughter and a friend. I’m complicated. And I hate the feelings I feel when asked, “Do you have kids?” Like I’m a fraud or a liar or not a “real mom.”
My path has been different. My journey, my own. But it doesn’t make it any less real even though it has been far from traditional…..
I am Not So Mommy… And I want to talk about that.
I’ve defined myself as a dog mom for a long time. As a Millennial who is 29 and married, it’s expected of me to have human children. I, however, do not want them. In my opinion, any woman who loves and cares for another human being can be considered a mom. Screw societal expectations – we can be whatever we want to be, however we want to be it. xoxo
“Screw societal expectations.” That may be my new mantra. 😉