Trigger Warning: If you are particularly vulnerable about missing out on every day moments with your own little, then you may not want to read this post.
Recently, our foreign exchange daughter, Bruna, came to visit us for nine amazing days. I’m always a bit sad when she leaves. And inevitably, I shed a few tears. The morning after dropping her off at the airport, I woke up with that all too familiar sadness. I knew that it would take all my strength to shake that feeling and not fall into what had the potential to be a major wobble on my childless walk. So, instead of being melancholy about everything I was now missing, I decided to focus on all the wonderful moments we shared while she was here. The extraordinary ordinary days…
Trying to avoid a wobble . . .
As I walked around the house, I smiled at all the little reminders of her visit. The bag of apples in the kitchen that we picked together at a nearby orchard, the empty shoebox next to the trashcan from the Nikes she bought to play basketball in, the housecoat lying on her bed because she gets so cold from the air conditioning… All these ordinary things and yet, they were extraordinary to me, bringing me comfort and happiness.
As I kept myself busy with chores, my mind wandered back over the past week. Bruna, Dane, Maddie, and I did a lot of fun things during her stay. But my favorite day was when we finished building the herb garden screen on our back patio. That evening, we enjoyed our handiwork while grilling hotdogs and making s’mores in our firepit. Just an ordinary day, but it felt extraordinary to me…
Find the extraordinary ordinary days . . .
I think that I love doing the simple things with Bruna because those ordinary moments are what we childless not by choice feel we are missing. The ordinary pleasures of talking, spending time together, making memories…
And then I realized that these extraordinary ordinary days do happen in our lives. But sometimes, we are so focused on the fact that they aren’t happening with the kiddos we wanted that we miss them…
If I’m not careful, I can forget that I have a multitude of amazing people in my life and extraordinary ordinary days are happening all around…
Like holding my Daddy’s hand and watching TV with him as he battled cancer. I’ll be forever grateful for that extraordinary ordinary day.
Or bowling with friends and family when we visited Oklahoma last summer. Afterwards, Dane took the top down on our rented Mustang and drove Bruna, Jake, and Ellie to Taco Bueno. All of us, including my oldest friends, sat around talking and eating fast food Mexican for over an hour.
Walking around Walgreens and Wal-Mart with my Mamaw every Wednesday during the summer. She loved to explore each and every aisle…
Walks downtown with Dane and Maddie…
Sitting in my Mom’s living room and talking for hours with her about everything and nothing…
Because the extraordinary ordinary days are life . . .
Childless not by choice, just because we do not have biological or adopted kiddos does not mean that our lives are not full. But we must be careful, because the extraordinary ordinary days will pass us by if we don’t look for them, if we don’t pay attention…
And that would be a shame. Because extraordinary ordinary days are not just good things, they are one of the BEST things of life. In fact, to me, they ARE life…
The sweet kisses from a fur baby, a long lunch with a friend, a surprise email from a loved one… Don’t miss these, fabulous one. Be on the look-out for the extraordinary ordinary. Allow them to help you redefine, to help you create a new, beautiful and courageous existence…
Tell us about one of your extraordinary ordinary days in the comments!
Want to learn more about having extraordinary ordinary days with a foreign exchange student?
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Part 2, “Not So Helpful Jokes” begins this Wed, 29 Aug.
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4 comments
My extraordinary ordinary days consist of an hour long phone conversation with you “just because”, lunches with you and Conner at Monterrey continuing a 35 year tradition, visiting aging loved ones that light up when they see you, sitting in my living room talking, talking, talking……filling up our hearts and souls. Would not trade any one of these ordinary moments for a world cruise or winning the lottery. These moments make us whole.❤??
Eloquently stated… So many hugs!
I am completely with you on the extraordinary ordinary days Brandi. Such a great way of putting it. Mine would include days with the pups: being chosen by first Mischief, then Lanson and finally Bailey to being their forever mum and dad. The day we drove 3hrs to take Bailey for a play day to meet Cattier only for Cattier to come home with us for a play date that is lasting a life time. Whilst none of us will ever forget the very ordinary Sunday that became an extraordinary day when Duval (part dog part kangaroo) jumped over our garden fence to break into our house because he was cold, lonely, hungry and frightened. Then there are the extra special days of holding my Grannie’s hand and reassuring her that my sister and I would be fine so that Grannie could slip away happy in the knowledge that we would be OK. And reassuring my step father that I would look after his pup, Parker, when Ron didn’t survive a kidney transplant. As for receiving a letter from my mother explaining she could only read about my visits to crocodile invested rivers without having a panic attack because I had spoken to her on the phone since I posted my letter. Well that extraordinary ordinary day will live with me for ever. They are all days to treasure and a reason for gratitude!
Thank you for sharing some of your extraordinary ordinary days with us, Nicci! They made my heart swell with emotion…