POSSIBLE TRIGGERS: Open and honest discussion about infertility, childlessness, grief, holidays, perspectives, and more…
Infertility and childlessness affect men, too. In fact, research shows that 30% of infertility is due to female factor, 30% to male factor, and the remaining to a combination or unexplained. In terms of childlessness by chance or by circumstance, there are men who never meet the right woman, remaining childless and single. There are also men that marry ladies who don’t want to have kids, but rather wish to live childfree by choice. Despite these truths, the male perspective of childless grief is discussed even less than childless women’s grief.
In May, I try to offer extra support to we childless women because “M” Day can be so triggering. Because Dad’s Day is in June, I wanted to publish some blogs specifically for childless men. So, at the beginning of the month, I requested that childless men submit their CNBC story to be published here at Not So Mommy… Though I had a couple of guys show a bit of interest, no one sent me their story.
You know, speaking from a woman’s perspective, I think it might be even harder for men to discuss their childless journey. Showing emotions such as sadness and vulnerability is not considered “manly.” And the jokes about “slow swimmers…” Well, I can understand why men are hesitant to openly share their CNBC stories.
But I really wanted to dedicate this blog to the male perspective of the CNBC story. So, I’m going to share some blogs from the archives, as well as a few resources…
The Male Perspective of the CNBC Story…
Dane’s CNBC Story
In 2018, I asked my husband if he would share his CNBC story in honor of Father’s Day. To be honest, I wasn’t sure if he would agree. So, I was extremely grateful when, without hesitation, he said, “Yes.” My husband has an amazing perspective on life… You can read Dane’s CNBC Story by clicking here.
Andrew’s CNBC Story
Also in 2018, Andrew, of Canbace Life, shared his CNBC story. Andrew’s story is complex. In fact, he explains his childless journey in three different parts. He is open and candid, and I am grateful that he shared his perspective… You can read Andrew’s CNBC Story by clicking here.
Shout-Outs: To the men who support childless women…
Earlier this month, not only did I request that men submit their CNBC stories, but I also asked women to send in shout-outs about the amazing guys in their lives. Three fabulous ladies wrote some incredible words about their childless husbands. You can read the shout-outs by clicking here.
Resources By and/or For Childless Men…
The largest voice within the childless not by choice community is female. Men are beginning to speak up, however. And there are a couple of guys who speak boldly about their childless journey…
Michael: Podcast Presenter & Blogger
Michael Hughes is one of three presenters on The Full Stop Podcast. He and his wife, Vickie, also write the blog, Married and Childless. Michael is very open about “surviving the trauma of being a childless couple,” as he puts it. You can listen to Michael on the podcast here and read his blog here.
Erik: Podcast Presenter
Erik and his wife, Melissa, present the podcast Live Childfree. Now, before you say that childfree is different than childless (which I agree), let me clarify. Erik and Melissa assert that they are “childfree after infertility.” In other words, they are childfree NOT by choice. Their podcast does embrace all childfree peers, however—whether by choice or by circumstance.
Childless Christians: Support Group for Men & Women…
I am one of three admins at Childless Christians, a closed Facebook group for Christians trying to accept a childless not by choice life. Though most of our 300+ members are women, we do have some men in the group who actively give their perspective. If you’d like to learn more about Childless Christians and/or join, click here.
It’s not too late to share your perspective…
Childless Men, if/when you are ready to tell your CNBC story, please know that you have a safe place to do that here. Whether it’s June or any other month, I would be honored to share your perspective with the Not So Mommy… (and Not So Daddy…) community. If you’d like to learn more about how to share your story, just click here.
If anything written resonates with you, fabulous one, please tell us about it in the comments.
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Featured Photo: Created by me, using Canva
