As a perfectionist, I’ve never been one to scribble outside the lines. But 2021 just might be the year…
Inspiring Shoes…
In October 2018, while celebrating a childfree Halloween in New Orleans, I purchased a pair of super cute, light pink tennis shoes. I’ve considered writing a blog about these pink tennis since I bought them. But I never quite found enough inspiration to create a full post…
In October 2020, I bought an incredible pair of chartreuse flats. I never buy pointy toe shoes because they hurt my toes. But these slide-ons with an open heel mean my toes aren’t pinched! And even better… These incredible shoes (whose color reminds me of the olive green Childless Not By Choice Awareness Ribbon) only cost 14 bucks! Inspired once again, I considered writing a blog post…
In December 2020, my hubby and I celebrated our 20th wedding anniversary. Since I believe 20
years is a pretty big deal, I decided to buy a special outfit to wear during our celebration. And a sexy pair of red heels completed my ensemble. Three pairs of amazing shoes. I really need to write that blog…
Inspiring Words…
As I was checking notifications on Not So Mommy… Insta, I came across a comment from a fabulous one who stated, “I’ve decided 2021 is going to be my year to scribble outside all the lines.”
Oh, I LOVE that!!!
“Scribble outside the lines…” That’s my inspiration!
So, I asked this fabulous one if I could quote her in my New Year’s blog, giving her credit for this incredible, incredible perspective.
And she said…
“Yes, of course!”
So, THANK YOU, Anne for your inspiring words!
Inspired Resolutions…
In 2019, I resolved to “Stop expecting others to understand my childless life. Just embrace my life and live who I am authentically and with joy!” (You can read more about that here.)
In 2020, I decided to strive to continue working towards my 2019 goal. (Read about that here.)
And in 2021…
Let’s Scribble Outside the Lines!
Well, not only am I going to fully embrace my life, but this is going to be my year to “scribble outside the lines.”
Yes, I’ll continue to wear my pink tennis and chartreuse flats and red heels and rose gold sandals and black boots and fuzzy slippers as I walk my truth as an infertile, childless warrior… A wife, aunt, blogger, friend… An imperfectly perfect woman who is redefining momhood as a host mom and over-zealous dog mom…
To quote fabulous Anne again…
I’m going to “… make a new kind of art[!]”
If anything I wrote resonates with you, fabulous one, please tell us about it in the comments. (You can simply use an initial rather than your name, if you wish to remain anonymous.)
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Walk in Our Shoes, “a social design project that raises awareness of involuntary childless through a unique combination of a feet selfie and story telling” also provided some inspiration for this blog post. You can check out Walk in Our Shoes by clicking here.
Featured Photo: Created by me, using Canva
2 comments
Thanks for this, it’s made me really think about my goals. I’m trying to come to terms with my infertility whilst still hoping to be a mum through adoption, the pain has been linked as one for so long I’m struggling to separate the two. I wanted to be a young mum, I’m now in my mid 40’s, so have been childless (in my eyes) for close to 20 years. I may have children (if we find the right match) but I won’t be their only mum, and it will not ‘cure’ my infertility. I feel like I don’t fit I to any group, so maybe I’m not scribbling outside the box but finding my own box, my own category. Childless grief has existed and been a huge part of my life but I will have children. I remain infertile but will have children…..it’s all so abstract!
Nicole, thank you for trusting me and this community enough to be vulnerable and share the truth of your heart. I am so sorry that you, too, are struggling through the grief of infertility and childlessness. I pray that you get your dream and find the right match so that you can adopt. (Though I realize adoption comes with its own struggles. As you said, you won’t be their only mom…) I do love your assertion, “I remain infertile but will have children…” In my heart, I have no doubt this is true–though you may have to redefine what “will have children” means to you. For me, my kids are nieces, nephews, an exchange daughter, and our fur baby. That’s what scribbling outside the lines looks like in my infertile world! You will find your “box,” as you said. Because I can tell from the words you wrote that you are strong! Sending you so many hugs…