To the Childless Community: What’s Your Story?

by Brandi Lytle
Photo of a typewriter with "What's your story?" written underneath on Good Things Stories on Not So Mommy...

Talking, writing, and journaling have always helped me process through problems.  So, when my hubby and I found out that we suffer from severe infertility, I wasn’t shy about letting others know that we were struggling.  Luckily, a vast majority of our friends, family, and co-workers were beyond supportive.

The Isolation

Despite being able to talk to others, despite their genuine concern and desire to help, I still felt utterly alone through our infertility battle.  Honestly, I didn’t even feel that my husband really understood what I was going through.  This isolation is one of the main reasons I decided to start writing this blog.  I wanted to reach out to others and let them know, you are not alone in this journey.

Finding a Community

What I did not expect when I started blogging was to find an entire community of childless women and men with whom I would connect.  I didn’t expect all the “me too” moments.  I didn’t expect to finally learn that I am not a freak for feeling the feels.  And I certainly didn’t expect to gain friendships around the globe with other women trying to accept their childless path.

Honestly, I am still amazed that there are so many of us out there!  Childless not by choice simply trying to find our way, live a fulfilling life, and feel accepted for who we are.  But we must talk about our journey…

Sharing Our Struggles

We must talk so that we can process through the emotions, the grief, the uncertainty…

We must talk so that we can educate others about our circumstances, about the fact that not everyone can simply have kids or just adopt

We must talk so that we can discover others just like us who are struggling through infertility and/or childlessness, but do not think there is anyone else who understands…

I talk about my journey on Not So Mommy… (obviously), but I am also a member of closed Facebook groups for the childless, follow and comment on other blogs, and even told my story on Life Without Baby (one of my favorite childless blogs).

What’s your story?

I encourage you to tell your story, too.  If you aren’t ready to talk openly to the world, then try joining a private Facebook group.  (I have several listed on the Resources page.)  You can always comment anonymously here.  (Just write “anonymous” instead of your name, or use a screenname or simply your initials…)

If you are feeling brave and want to share more details of your story, I encourage you to check out “Your Good Things Stories.” You just answer a few questions about your struggles and how you overcame them (or how you are trying to overcome them).  You can request your story be published under any name you choose or anonymously, if you prefer.

A Place of Inspiration

I truly want Not So Mommy… to be a place of inspiration, not just for the childless, but for anyone who is hurting.  That is why I try to focus on the positive and that is why I share Good Things every Monday.  On the last Monday of every month, I share a “Good Things Story” from a fellow survivor.  As of today (8 Dec 2017), three brave women have shared their stories.

Ashley talked about overcoming depression after being bullied.  (Read Ashley’s Story.)

Kat discussed struggling to obtain the “American Dream,” but finding joy again through her photography.  (Read Kat’s Story.)

And Courtney bravely shared about her difficult divorce and discovering her true worth.  (Read Courtney’s Story.)

Each of these women encouraged me, and I hope their stories motivate you, as well.

So, fabulous one, do you want to tell your story?  You never know who you might inspire…

Click here to share Your Good Things Story…

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