Brave & Strong & Broken

by Brandi Lytle
Close-up of a woman's eye looking off in the distance on Brave & Strong & Broken on Infertilty/Childless Blog on Not So Mommy...

As a childless woman, I am broken.  My uterus just doesn’t work quite right.  Yet, despite this brokenness, I had to (still have to) be brave and strong.  I had to be strong through infertility treatments.  And I had to be brave as I embraced a life I had not dreamed of, a childless life.  In the words of Anna Funder, “She was brave & strong & broken all at once.”

Because we childless go through so much…  Because we have a unique grief that can be all consuming…  Because we are misunderstood too often…  Because of these things, I believe we sometimes forget that there are many others in this world who must also be brave & strong & broken. . .

The Many Brave & Strong & Broken. . .

The barely 20-year-old who loses her father to cancer at Christmastime.

The not quite 40-year-old diagnosed with Stage 4 breast cancer.

The 1-year-old in ICU with meningitis.

The 60-something in the hospital for unknown reasons, with doctors who just can’t figure it out.

The 92-year-old with pneumonia because when she swallows her food goes into her lungs instead of her stomach.

The late 30s-year-old with little self-confidence who stays in an abusive relationship.

The teenager whose dad goes on a business trip and never comes home.

The 40-something who is single and struggles with depression.

Each of these people—from young to old, male to female, single to married, childless to fertile—each of them must be brave and strong, despite being broken.

From Broken to Beautiful. . .

So, while we struggle with our own challenges—challenges which can be overwhelming, beyond difficult, and unfair—let us remember that we are not the only ones with struggles.  Let us allow our brokenness to develop a deep sense of empathy, a connection, an understanding of difficulties.  Let us allow our brokenness to make us even braver and even stronger.  Let us allow our brokenness to create a beautiful being who can show others what it means to persevere.

And let us do all these things, remembering that Jesus said, “I have told you these things so that, in me, you may have peace.  In this world, you will have trouble.  But take heart!  I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33 NIV)


Photo of a young woman looking out at the ocean with the Anna Funder quote, "She was brave & strong & broken all at once" on Not So Mommy...

Brave & Strong & Broken on Not So Mommy…


Featured Photo:  Lisa Fotios on

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Lisa February 14, 2018 - 12:52 am

This is so true. It is up to ourselves to try and see the rest of the world around us. We can be so easily hurt by someone’s innocent comment and I’m sure in our turn that we would unintentionally wound others. I hope that our experiences would make us more sensitive to other people’s pain and not just insulated in our own pain.

Brandi Lytle February 14, 2018 - 10:28 am

Exactly, Lisa. We can allow our pain to make us better, more empathetic individuals rather than remaining isolated within our own grief.

Sherry February 2, 2018 - 2:56 pm



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