By telling my story of embracing infertility and redefining what momhood means to me, I hope to inspire others to be their authentic selves and live this imperfectly perfect life.
Hey, fabulous one! I am so glad that you found Not So Mommy! I’m Brandi Lytle and to describe myself is, well… complicated. One thing is for sure, though. My life has not turned out the way that I planned.
An Oklahoma girl, I always thought I’d be just a good ol’ fashioned Mom, with two kids, a husband, a dog, and a cat, living in my traditional house. Heck, even as a little girl, I toted my Cabbage Patch Kid around in a carrier on my chest. But life took me on a different journey.
I live in South Carolina with my hubby, Dane, and I am definitely not a traditional Mom.
After 10 years of trying to have a baby and seven failed fertility treatments, Dane told me that he didn’t want to keep trying…
Mind you, he knows that I am a perfectionist who desires to make decisive decisions (and stick with them) and very much dislike change. So, the fact that I had always wanted to be a mom, but now it seemed that dream was dead… Well, it turned my whole world upside down.
As I started trying to figure out who I was going to be now and what this new life was going to look like, I felt like such an outcast. I didn’t think there was anyone else in the world like me–a dog mom, an aunt, a wife, a teacher name Profe, an infertile woman with a hole in her heart that just couldn’t seem to be filled….
I was alone. That’s the thing about infertility–it can be all-consuming and make you feel so alone. Even as I reached out to other infertile women, I didn’t find comfort. All their stories seemed to end the same way—a pregnancy, an adoption, a baby. My story would not end that way….
And so, I had to redefine myself. Of course, I’m still a dog mom, an aunt, a wife. Although I no longer teach, I’m still a Profe to all those kids I taught for 17 years. And although I’m still an infertile woman, it no longer seems like the worst thing in the world. I’m also a blogger, entrepreneur, introvert, and still a perfectionist. And I’m even a Mom, just not in the traditional sense. I had to redefine that word for myself, too.
I had to discover how to live my imperfectly perfect life.
And even though I am too sensitive and telling my story opens me up to criticism, I feel strongly that I must tell it. In my heart of hearts, I know that someone (maybe you?) needs to hear this story. So, I will risk judgment to help that struggling person not feel so alone.
Even if you aren’t infertile or struggling or alone, I hope that reading about my life, my story, my journey helps you to live your imperfectly perfect life even more fully.
Take the risk. Redefine you.